At Chapter 2, we recognise that as a widow, you may never have been online dating. It can be confusing and scary! Where does one start?
The good news is you are in the right place! Chapter 2 is a safe and secure place to take the first steps forward to dating. We are a like-minded, supportive community of widows and widowers who all understand how you are feeling.
You need to upload some photos. We suggest at least three, ideally six, but on Chapter 2 you can have unlimited photos.
Select your photos wisely and with care. Try to choose shots that reflect your personality and give an insight into who you are. If you love to travel, share a picture of you at a favourite travel destination. Remember a picture paints a thousand words.
Ensure your photos are just of you. Do not include pictures of you with family and friends as this can be confusing to anyone viewing your profile. You can however include a picture of your pets, as this reveals your love of animals!
Photos of you enjoying hobbies can also work, but please think about the details. Gentlemen, we do not want to see you holding a big fish, the one that didn’t get away, that’s really not what anyone wants to see! And I can’t help imagining the maggots!
Be honest with yourself and with your future connections. Post pictures that are recent (within the last 12 months) and accurate. I can’t believe we need to say this, but please keep them clean – no rude photos thank you! This brings us to the subject of clothing. May we suggest you try and include a range of looks – smart, casual or dinner date ready?
Photos carefully chosen and uploaded you can now move on to…
There is no word count at Chapter 2, it can be as long and detailed or as short and precise as you would like. Often less is more as you create a little intrigue and include some interests, so you have talking points in common when you make a match. An empty profile does not attract anyone, it looks like you are not invested in finding a relationship, friendship or companionship, or committed to finding your chapter 2.
Try to show your personality and, we know this may seem hard, try to include a little humour!
As an example, my profile reads:
Busy, sociable, mum to a 15-year-old son looking for fun dinner dates with a man around my age (51) that don’t involve conversations about Lego, superheroes or roller-coasters. I’ve been widowed for 2 years now and I’m looking to find my next chapter. I’m based near Bury and I’m looking for a committed relationship.
You might want to write a few drafts before you submit your final profile but remember you can edit your profile if you want to make changes in the future.
What are you looking for? Friendship? Companionship? Relationship? In fact all 3 is fine!
Are you looking for a man, woman, either, non-binary or prefer not to say?
What is your preferred location and geographical radius? We suggest leaving this as wide as you can e.g. 50 miles. Sometimes longer distances work well for new relationships, and it will give you a wider selection of profiles to choose from.
You can also set age ranges if you would like. Try to be open-minded about this as your chapter 2 might be 61, not 60 and that could mean a missed opportunity!
Profile complete, preferences set – what happens next?
So now your photos, profile and preferences are complete you need to look for some matches.
We know that you only get out of online dating what you put in. You will need to be courageous and spend time reading profiles, liking profiles and engaging in conversation and messaging.
Once you have viewed each profile you have the option to like and message each other securely through the site whilst you get to know one another. Do not share your personal information like phone number and address until you have had multiple chats through the security of the website and feel confident.
When you get a match it’s time to act. Fortune favours the brave! Start the conversation casually – ‘How are you?’ or ‘Have you had a good weekend?’ As you grow in confidence you can have a more engaging conversation.
Personally speaking, I find there is a lot to be said about meeting someone relatively quickly after messaging. Meeting is the only way to find out if there is a spark and find out if someone is ‘in’ or ‘out.’ When you choose to meet is up to you, all we ask is that you feel 100% comfortable with your match and that you adopt safe dating etiquette – meet in a public space, travel under your own steam, and do not accept a lift home.
A casual coffee in the day is the easiest, low-pressure date and it’s easy to exit if it’s not working for you.
Register today and good luck!
For more advice, or if you have any words of wisdom you would like to share, please get in touch nicky@chapter2dating.co.uk
Oh! And don’t forget to share your journey and dating stories.